Before I Let You Go

Before I Let You Go

The 2:00 a.m. call is the first time Lexie Vidler has heard her sister’s voice in years. Annie is a drug addict, a thief, a liar—and in trouble, again. Lexie has always bailed Annie out, given her money, a place to sleep, sent her to every kind of rehab. But this time, she’s not just strung out—she’s pregnant and in premature labor. If she goes to the hospital, she’ll lose...

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Title:Before I Let You Go
Author:Kelly Rimmer
Rating:
Edition Language:English

Before I Let You Go Reviews

  • Jennifer ~ TarHeelReader & Traveling Sister

    🌟 🌟 🌟 🌟 🌟

    When Lexie’s estranged sister, Annie, calls her one day for help, it’s serious. Annie has been using drugs again, and she’s pregnant and showing signs of early labor. On top of that, she’s afraid she’ll lose her baby and possibly be arrested due to endangerment laws.

    The reader quickly learns there’s more to Annie’s past and why she abuses drugs, a past that is quite painful and told through her

    🌟 🌟 🌟 🌟 🌟

    When Lexie’s estranged sister, Annie, calls her one day for help, it’s serious. Annie has been using drugs again, and she’s pregnant and showing signs of early labor. On top of that, she’s afraid she’ll lose her baby and possibly be arrested due to endangerment laws.

    The reader quickly learns there’s more to Annie’s past and why she abuses drugs, a past that is quite painful and told through her own words in letters. What ensues is the push-pull dynamic of a sibling trying to help, support, advocate for, and love her sister in all the ways she knows how, as both a doctor and family member.

    Because of the unique sibling interplay, as well as the underlying mental illness and tremendous pain, this book reminded me of Everything Here is Beautiful, another favorite book of mine this year. The characterization and writing styles are different, but the emotionality and authenticity are there in both books in spades.

    At times raw, but always honest and compelling, Before I Let You Go is an important read. One that sheds light on addiction and its impact on families, but at a much deeper level, how society treats females with drug addiction differently, mothers especially, legally and with underlying stigma.

    This was a Traveling Sister read, and I enjoyed the discussion that this thought-provoking book generated. Please visit Norma and Brenda’s blog for this review, the combined Traveling Sister reviews, and much more:

    Thank you to Kelly Rimmer for writing this book with great care and compassion, as well as Graydon House/Harper Collins, and Edelweiss for the complimentary copy.

  • Lindsay - Traveling Sister

    5 stars! This was a touching and emotional novel that affected me deeply. I have not stopped thinking about these characters since I finished reading.

    This is a story about addiction. It involves family secrets that test the strength of the bond of sisters. This novel will challenge you to examine your thoughts and feelings toward addiction and the effects it has on the addict as well as their families. My mind was swimming with my thoughts and reactions as the story progressed. I questioned myse

    5 stars! This was a touching and emotional novel that affected me deeply. I have not stopped thinking about these characters since I finished reading.

    This is a story about addiction. It involves family secrets that test the strength of the bond of sisters. This novel will challenge you to examine your thoughts and feelings toward addiction and the effects it has on the addict as well as their families. My mind was swimming with my thoughts and reactions as the story progressed. I questioned myself constantly throughout the pages of this novel, asking how I would react and I really struggled to find my answers (some answers I still have not yet found).

    There are many books about addiction. For me, the piece that truly pulled me into this story was that it was about drug addiction during pregnancy. This got right to my heart and kept me fully invested from first to the last sentence.

    I will warn readers that there are upsetting scenes and discussions about the effects that substance abuse during pregnancy has on a newborn baby, but my suggestion is to push through these uncomfortable details (if you feel you can) because this story, as a whole, is deeply contemplative and insightful. It was a very eye-opening journey – one I will never forget experiencing. I would like to thank Kelly Rimmer for writing this deeply affecting story and opening up my mind to understand and show compassion to people who are often judged and ridiculed.

    This was a Traveling Sister Read and it sparked very deep discussion and debate. To find this review, along with the other Traveling Sister reviews, please visit Norma and Brenda’s fabulous blog at:

    A big thank you to NetGalley, HARLEQUIN – Graydon House Books and Kelly Rimmer for providing an ARC in exchange for an honest review!

    Date of Publication: April 3, 2018.

  • Deanna

    My reviews can also be seen at:

    After falling in love with Kelly Rimmer’s previous novel “

    ”, I was thrilled to have the opportunity to read this upcoming novel.

    Lexie Vidler is a doctor who is used to getting calls in the middle of the night on her cell phone. Although she hasn’t spoken to her sister, Annie in more than two years, Lexie isn’t surprised to hear Annie’s voice when her landline rings at 2:00am. She tries to prepare herse

    My reviews can also be seen at:

    After falling in love with Kelly Rimmer’s previous novel “

    ”, I was thrilled to have the opportunity to read this upcoming novel.

    Lexie Vidler is a doctor who is used to getting calls in the middle of the night on her cell phone. Although she hasn’t spoken to her sister, Annie in more than two years, Lexie isn’t surprised to hear Annie’s voice when her landline rings at 2:00am. She tries to prepare herself for the only thing contact with Annie has brought her over the years…

    Instantly, Lexie can tell her sister is high, and angrily tells her to go to the hospital. Her fiancé, Sam is now awake and seems surprised at her tone. However, this isn’t the first middle of the night call she’s received from her little sister….

    But Lexie is completely unprepared for what Annie says next….

    Lexie has always tried to be there for Annie. When they were young, their father died and their mother went to pieces. Emotionally they were on their own and so Lexie was the one who stepped up to take care of Annie. Lexie had always promised her father that she would take care of Annie. But when Annie pulled a stunt two years earlier that almost got Lexie fired, she knew she had to cut ties with her sister. But THIS is different. This time it’s not just Annie that needs her.

    So much is riding on Annie getting clean. Lexie wants to advocate for her sister, but their complicated past has left her with mixed feelings. For Annie to get better and to heal, she will need to address the issues she’s tried to suppress by self-medicating. The secrets she kept from everyone….including Lexie.

    Wow! Once again, Kelly Rimmer has written a book that I couldn’t put down. I was hooked from the start and became completely engrossed in the story and its characters. I could relate to the sister's complicated relationship. Because of my own experiences and relationships, some parts of the book hit me very hard. I was emotional and even angry at times. It made me question some of my own pre-conceived notions. And though I’ve finished the book…I can’t stop thinking about it.

    This was definitely a thought-provoking read with some controversial issues that could help start some important discussions. The author has obviously done her research and I feel like the story was well-balanced, honest, realistic, and of course, interesting.

    is a well-written and poignant book about love, family, addiction, abuse, loss, and forgiveness. Another great read from Kelly Rimmer that I won’t soon forget.

    Thank you to NetGalley and Graydon House for the opportunity to read this book in exchange for my honest review.

  • Theresa Alan

    I really love this novel, and here are a couple reasons why: One, Rimmer is sympathetic to both addicts and the family members dealing with addicted love ones. Two, Rimmer is a hugely talented writer.

    The story is about two sisters who have been estranged for two years because one of them has battled drug addiction for years. Lexie is the together sister—a doctor who is engaged to a wonderful man. Annie is the sister who has battled drug addiction. Lexie is used to getting late-night calls of req

    I really love this novel, and here are a couple reasons why: One, Rimmer is sympathetic to both addicts and the family members dealing with addicted love ones. Two, Rimmer is a hugely talented writer.

    The story is about two sisters who have been estranged for two years because one of them has battled drug addiction for years. Lexie is the together sister—a doctor who is engaged to a wonderful man. Annie is the sister who has battled drug addiction. Lexie is used to getting late-night calls of requests for help from Annie. She’s put her in rehab, giving her a place to stay, tried to be understanding. She knows addiction is a disease, but it’s frustrating and heart-breaking nonetheless. But this late-night call is different—Annie tells her that she’s pregnant, and because she has still been getting high, she can’t go to the hospital or she risks losing the baby to social services.

    Lexie and her fiancé Sam rush to help her. Annie is in premature labor and will die if she doesn’t get to the hospital. What follows is a harrowing tale of Annie trying to get clean and keep custody of her baby and Lexie doing her best to advocate on her behalf.

    “We hold our pregnant woman on a pedestal in this society. We say we want the best thing for the babies, so we want to tell their mommas what to eat, what they can drink, what they drugs they can use . . . and there’s good intentions there, and maybe it’s the kind of thing that’s too nuanced to draw the line across but . . . for sure there’s a vein of misogyny here, too. Women who use drugs in pregnancy have fallen off the pedestal, and don’t we all just love to punish them for that.”

    “In the last few years . . . politicians talking aout compassion with people with addiction, but . . . no one ever talks about compassion for women who are pregnant and have have addictions. Maybe we’re progressing to the point that we realize that raging addiction isn’t exactly a lifestyle choice, but we’re world’s away from applying that same logic to women who happen to be pregnant. We want our mommas to be perfect, and when they stumble and fall, we punish them.”

    The recovery rates for people with substance abuse issues are abysmal. Rimmer deals with the subject with compassion and objectivity. This is a must-read for sure.

    Thanks so much to NetGalley and Graydon House for the opportunity to review this novel.

  • Mary Beth *Traveling Sister*

    Lexie gets a phone call at 2 am from her sister, Annie. She hasn't heard from her in years. She finds out that Annie is pregnant, but she won't go to the hospital, because she is afraid that she can't pass a drug test.

    Annie is a drug addict. She has failed over and over again to get clean and sober. If she goes to the hospital, she knows that she will lose custody of her baby. She might even have to go to prison.

    Lexie has always been there for her sister. They both share a strong bond of a ter

    Lexie gets a phone call at 2 am from her sister, Annie. She hasn't heard from her in years. She finds out that Annie is pregnant, but she won't go to the hospital, because she is afraid that she can't pass a drug test.

    Annie is a drug addict. She has failed over and over again to get clean and sober. If she goes to the hospital, she knows that she will lose custody of her baby. She might even have to go to prison.

    Lexie has always been there for her sister. They both share a strong bond of a terrible painful childhood. Lexie has her hands full.

    She is a doctor and plans on getting married soon. They both live different lives. Lexie is in danger of losing her job.

    Annie is in Rehab and writes her story through letters that are long buried secrets from the sister's childhood.

    This was such a heartbreaking story. I just loved Annie. It had me in an emotional mess. The author shows that addiction affects every member of the family. The author did a great job telling both sides of the story, Annie, the addict, and Lexie the family member, who is affected by her sister's addiction.

    Their childhood was such a terrible painful past. This book made me feel, I was in tears in certain parts of the story. This book covers so many emotional issues and difficult subject matter. I thought Lexie did everything she could do to help her sister.

    This was a page turner for me. I just wanted to find out what happened next.

    I loved the characters. I had empathy for Annie, Lexie and Sam.

    Make sure you have tissues handy, while reading this book.

    This was a Traveling Sister Read and it was a great discussion and I really enjoyed reading this with them.

    I want to thank Edelweiss, Graydon House/ Harper Collins and Kelly Rimmer for the copy of this book in exchange for an honest review.

  • Norma * Traveling Sister

    4.5 stars!

    BEFORE I LET YOU GO by KELLY RIMMER is a touching, raw, heartbreaking and an absolutely wonderful novel that had me totally emotionally engaged and interested throughout the entire book. I was totally immersed in this deeply moving and beautifully written story here making it hard to put down.

    KELLY RIMMER delivers a compassionate, thought-provoking and well-written story here that touches on so many emotional issues and the sensitive subject matter of addiction. The story was told in

    4.5 stars!

    BEFORE I LET YOU GO by KELLY RIMMER is a touching, raw, heartbreaking and an absolutely wonderful novel that had me totally emotionally engaged and interested throughout the entire book. I was totally immersed in this deeply moving and beautifully written story here making it hard to put down.

    KELLY RIMMER delivers a compassionate, thought-provoking and well-written story here that touches on so many emotional issues and the sensitive subject matter of addiction. The story was told in alternating perspectives from Lexie in present day and from Annie through letters and diary entries. The portrayal of these characters and the bond that these two sisters shared was executed so well and in a realistic and honest way that touched my heart.

    To sum it all up it was an interesting, insightful, unforgettable, emotional, and an enjoyable read with a touching, heart-wrenching, and bittersweet ending. Would highly recommend!

    Publishing Date: April 3, 2018

    Thank you so much to NetGalley, Harlequin - Graydon House Books and Kelly Rimmer for the opportunity to read an advanced copy of the book in exchange for a review!

    Review is written and posted on our themed book blog Two Sisters Lost In A Coulee Reading:

    COULEE is a term applied rather loosely to different landforms, all of which refer to a kind of valley.

    Where I live I am surrounded by Coulee's! :-)

  • Susanne Strong

    4 Emotional Stars.

    Lexie Vidler’s relationship with her sister Annie has always been complicated. Their childhood wasn’t like most families and Annie always relied on her sister as a mother figure. When Lexie gets a call at 2 a.m. after not hearing from heard sister for years, she knows something is wrong. Something bad. But then something is always wrong with Annie. Annie is a drug addict. Has been for years. This time however, it’s not just drugs that Annie has a problem with. Annie is strung o

    4 Emotional Stars.

    Lexie Vidler’s relationship with her sister Annie has always been complicated. Their childhood wasn’t like most families and Annie always relied on her sister as a mother figure. When Lexie gets a call at 2 a.m. after not hearing from heard sister for years, she knows something is wrong. Something bad. But then something is always wrong with Annie. Annie is a drug addict. Has been for years. This time however, it’s not just drugs that Annie has a problem with. Annie is strung out and extremely pregnant and Annie needs medical attention.

    Where they live in Alabama, it’s a felony to use drugs while pregnant, thus if Annie gives birth in the hospital, she will lose custody of her baby and go to prison. Yet Annie calls her sister, - her sister - the doctor (whose boyfriend is also an M.D.). Lexie wants to help and she only knows one way to do so. Soon Lexie and her boyfriend Sam’s life is turned upside down, caring for Annie’s daughter Daisy, while Annie is in court ordered rehab.

    Lexie and Annie’s relationship is complicated. Always has been. Their childhood, was unlike any other. Annie’s past haunts her. It is heartbreaking. She is raw, pained and struggling. At times, it seemed like she simply just survived. Lexie has always been the mother figure. She has always been the defensive one, unable to let anyone in, ashamed of her sister. Ashamed of her own life. Addiction, you see, is a family disease. You can’t hide from it, even when you want to, and that was prevalent here, as Lexie tried to do so for years.

    “Before I Let You Go” by Kelly Rimmer - expertly delved into the subject of drug addiction and how it affected two sisters and their families, as well. Heart wrenching doesn’t begin to cover it. As I said, addiction is a family disease. It is not a label and everyone has a story. Lexie and Annie’s is a powerful one. The characters make you feel, they tear at your heart, make you anxious, make you angry and make you cry. “Before I Let You Go” is a novel that captures a lot of emotions and is one that I highly recommend.

    I read this novel with several of my Traveling Sisters. Our reactions sparked incredible discussions. Thank you sisters. I’m so glad I read this one with all you. For Full Traveling Sister Group Reviews, please see Brenda and Norma’s Amazing Blog:

    Thank you to Edelweiss, Harper Collins and Kelly Rimmer for an ARC of this novel to read and review.

    Published on Edelweiss, Goodreads and Twitter on 3.24.18.

  • Jen

    Two sisters: one a physician the other a drug addict. One whose unborn baby's life is at risk. The consequences of being an addict and having your parental rights stripped. Then the struggle of doing what's right despite the love you have which has become a codependency. The sacrifices made.

    This was a surprisingly engaging story told from both sister's POV.

    It is also a foray into the depths of addiction and the struggle to come clean. The good days; the bad. The hopelessness and despair along wi

    Two sisters: one a physician the other a drug addict. One whose unborn baby's life is at risk. The consequences of being an addict and having your parental rights stripped. Then the struggle of doing what's right despite the love you have which has become a codependency. The sacrifices made.

    This was a surprisingly engaging story told from both sister's POV.

    It is also a foray into the depths of addiction and the struggle to come clean. The good days; the bad. The hopelessness and despair along with the strength required to get well; and the long road to healing and the necessary support systems that need to be in place to recover.

    Rimmer delivers a blunt story of sobriety, of the legalities around pregnant addicted women and the stigma that attaches itself to them.

    Well done. 4⭐️

  • Diane S ☔

    3.5 A subject that is important and one has not been explored enough in fiction. A pregnant woman, addicted to heroin,who will lose her child and have to serve prison time. A law, which I never knew, that is enforced in some states. At first I had a hard time not being judgemental, having a baby that has to go through withdrawal, just such a horrible thing. Once I read Annie's story though I felt equally sorry for her and what she has gone through. As my grandmother used to tell us, everyone has

    3.5 A subject that is important and one has not been explored enough in fiction. A pregnant woman, addicted to heroin,who will lose her child and have to serve prison time. A law, which I never knew, that is enforced in some states. At first I had a hard time not being judgemental, having a baby that has to go through withdrawal, just such a horrible thing. Once I read Annie's story though I felt equally sorry for her and what she has gone through. As my grandmother used to tell us, everyone has a story, and it is certainly true here.

    Lexie, her older sister, a doctor who has tried to help Annie numerous times, tries to help her again. Taking on the task of caring for the infant, Daisy while Annie goes to rehab. Completing rehab a court imposed mandate if she wants to avoid jail time and ever having a chance of reclaiming her child. Unfortunately I didn't taeto Lexie's character as much as I did Annie's. For a doctor she seemed over emotional, not the capable person she was supposed to be. Repetitive thoughts and actions, whiny at times, which I felt stalled the plot. Also her fiance seemed to good too be true. Alternating between controlling and supportive. Something about him bugged me.

    So another mixed read for me, good story for the most part, very worthy subject and a characters terrific, Annie that will frustrate you but who you can't help pulling for. A sisters read with many of us falling on different ends of the rating spectrum. Made for some good discussions though as I'm sure everyone's life experience had a play in their reception of this novel.

    ARC from Netgalley.

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